Saturday, March 22, 2014

Phlegmatic: Nothing to Do With Phlegm Whatsoever.

....Hi? She asked nervously, aware that she hadn't cracked the door on Blogger in weeks.
Oh hi, come on in.
You're not mad?
No, I have no feelings on the matter at all. Now, pull up a chair and get writing.
She smiled, and sat down.
....actually, scratch that...go brush your hair or put a hat on and get some coffee. Then you can start writing.
Haha. Nice to see you again, Blogger. So glad you haven't changed.

                            *        *        *

GUESS WHAT!! I learned this morning when I should have been sleeping in but was freezing and too cold to get up and shut the window....
that James Franco has a published book OF POETRY!!!! I KNOW!!!! AND he has his Masters Degree in poetry! I got to get my hands on that book! My grammar is so bad today!!!

Alright. Out of system. System pauses, gears turn.

The Phlegmatic


Have you ever met someone who simply didn't seem to care all that much? Now, if you are a "carer" (rather passionate and verbal about things), this not seeming to care will drive you slightly mad. Notice the word seems. 

"Seems," madam? Nay, it is; I know not "seems." (Hamlet)

Hamlet, I dare say, was not phlegmatic. Though he could have been, a touch, along with strong Melancholy, which would explain his tortured mind and difficulty making decisions. Better leave Hamlet for now. Especially since he is dead, and also a fictional character. Lol.
...

The Phlegmatic leans against the door, smiling a little, watching. Not saying anything, and appearing not to watch, he takes in the group. He is evaluating, pondering, discarding this and holding on to that. He is bemused by the laughing, flamboyant creature dancing from guest to guest, shrieking and spilling things, and allows himself a subtle eye roll as she pirouettes nearby, holding an enormous piece of chocolate cake that looks destined for glory or the floor. Someone stops to talk, and he forgets her, enjoying listening to the rapid banter, injecting a word, or even an explanation, and a dose of his dry humor here and there. He longs to sit down, but every comfortable seat is taken.

Portrait of the Phlegmatic

This personality type loves peace. Peace, at all cost. The are good mediators, but sometimes get stuck in family situations, trying to keep the peace, and losing a bit of themselves in the process. They can be taken advantage of because they won't often speak up. Others get more attention because they holler louder. "The squeaky wheel gets the grease...? well, fine, grease it. I will be in my room."

Phlegmatics, if you haven't guessed, are introverted. They crave peace and time alone. Being with people is ok, but it exhausts them. If you walk into an unknown house and have 5 minutes to guess personalities, the Phlegmatic is in a quiet corner with a book, or just staring out the window contemplating the complexities of life.

Phlegmatic types can be hard to reach. And tough to read, as they are not big sharers.  But don't be offended. They just honestly aren't thinking about calling or texting or reaching out to you. Go ahead and call them, they will be happy, but don't expect a call back next week, and don't waste time and energy being upset about it. Not that they don't care; rather, they are truly empathetic and want to be sensitive to the feelings of others.

Phlegmatics are often labeled "Lazy". Now, this is a bit harsh. There's a grain of truth though, as they will definitely do only what is necessary to get the job done. The path of least resistance.  One of the most profound statements I have heard from a Phlegmatic is this: Nothing is ever pressing. There is nothing that needs to get done Right Now.  For this reason Phlegmatics can thrive under pressure, because they need to be pushed, need a reason to get going. They can be extremely hard workers, if working on a task that makes sense to them.

Most Phlegmatics are slow burners in the temper category. They may lose their cool very slowly, but when they do... Duck!! A ten mile fuse, but a huge pile of dynamite. You may have fun pushing their buttons, but be prepared for the hammer to come down. 99% of the time, though, Phlegmatics are stable and calm.

Phlegmatics can have a good time no matter what is going on. They don't have to be busy, don't need wild entertainment, and they are competitive only when they chose to be. They are content! Imagine that.
(No, I can't really imagine it. But I do try....)

Final Thoughts

The Phlegmatic personality is the most fascinating, in my opinion. Probably the hardest for me to understand. Some of my very favorite people in the world lean toward the Phlegmatic. One day, when I grow up, and am a complete and whole person, I will be a Phlegmatic too.