Old Books, Donkeys, and Living with Parents

Journal Entry #4

So let us pretend the last post never happened; I put it back in Drafts. I'm thinking it was a bit raw. Perhaps in want of more time under the old broiler, so to speak. Janet Malcolm, in her controversial book The Silent Woman: Sylvia Plath and Ted Hughes wrote, "Poets and novelists and playwrights make themselves, against terrible resistances, give over what the rest of us keep safely locked in our hearts." It wasn't such a fight - it simply spilled over. The angst of not knowing how to draw my own lines spilled over. Now we are moving on.

Nearing the end of our sixth week living at my parents, I have to say, it's not all fun and games, not all coming up roses, not ...whatever. Many people have said, glancing at me under their eyebrows, "So how is it living at your parents??" Blinking and smiling, always blinking, innocently. And smiling.

There have been a few tense moments. But in all honesty I have discovered so many treasures along the way, like a kid with shells on a seaside vacation. And I thought I would mention a few.

Old books that I poured over as a girl, dog-eared and loved into softness. I flip a few pages, read a line or two, and the words sing in my heart. Mistress Pat by L.M. Montgomery - I noticed it leaning inconspicuously against a rather serious brown commentary at the bottom of a bookshelf. It smells like my youth, eyes wide, sensing all the emotions in the universe through the pen of one writer or another.

Sweet Little Kids that belong to brothers and sisters of mine, cupping my chin with their chubby warm hands and saying, "Auntie Pam, Auntie Pam!..." with earnest, heart-melting brown eyes. How can I resist? I enjoyed hearing their bare feet patter over the floor, knowing they were searching for food, or Grandma, or food....or Grandma who must have treats somewhere...or marshmallows...
Or perhaps a little respite in the bathroom, just, and Auntie Pam, you wait out there, and I will call you (exactly three seconds later, "AUNTIE PAMMMM!!!"). Ah, such sweetness. Even at ungodly hours of the morning (such as 8 or 9am), so wonderfully adorable. I gush.

Lovely Vistas of green rolling fields, and the smell of farm and bales of  hay, and clover honey-wafting over the fence. The gathering storm seen from the windows. Early morning pink-lavender skies and late summer evening orange-magenta sunsets. Peas from the garden. The thunder of hoof beats across the ground as the horses run for no reason other than they taste freedom on the wind.
The insanely raucous hee-haw of Brownie the miniature donkey...at three in the morning, braying as if he was the first animal created....whoops, I'm puncturing the dreamy atmosphere completely. As did he.
Back to the lovely vistas...  

Evening Chats over tea in beautiful mugs. Tired and thoughtful, mulling over the day and the days to come. Conversation and company.

All treasures, and treasured. Of course I could go on. There was a mysterious supply of DQ ice cream treats that seemed to appear and disappear like mists on the moors. Nothing left but smacking lips and wooden sticks. Quad rides. Walks along the road. Swinging. So, when people ask me with that gleam in their eye, "How is it living with your parents?" with their Mister Bean smiles; tea, beauty and memories are all I have to say. And Thank-you, to the most wonderful parents. I love you. Please shoot that donkey. No, it's ok. I'll do it.

The Train Wreck that is my Mind

Journal Entry 3 - Train Wreck

It’s been too long, again, but I’m not really apologizing because as you can imagine, things have been less than stellar lately in relation to a Blog-Friendly Environment. Moving, packing, living out of a suitcase and/or various baskets strewn here and there on top of each other – not entirely conducive to the creative process. But I digress.

Part of the reason for the delay and the nonsense is the smoking train wreck that is my brain. I’ve been spending time... picking through the thought processes that have imploded into other thoughts, like carefully pulling out trains derailed in a glorious, upturned disaster zone. Caution tape dangles from unrecognizable metal parts.

 

There are tracks for old house, new house, vacation, family, mortgages, bills, current demands, future worries, future hopes. Kids, dog, not my lawn anymore, where is my mail, computer isn’t working, what should I be doing, laundry, new job? new schools. I feel perhaps like Alice in the maze. I don’t sleep much, not sure why – life has calmed down considerably in the waiting phase - but I can't sleep. Wah. I confess I've been coping with things by living in a fantasy world in my head, half the time. An internal escape hatch, if that makes sense. Of course it's not the first time. Imagination is a gift.

The trick, I'm learning, is to live in the moment. Sounds easy. Not so much for this planner-type, yours truly. If I take each day as it comes, do what I can, take care of my own, don’t try to squeeze too much out of myself – things are fine. I have had several moments of simply enjoying summer. We went to Whistler for a little holiday, and I can't say enough good things about the amazingness of that place! I don't want to say too much because I don't want all 7 of you going there and crowding up the place. So I'll just paint a picture...

a chair lift moves through vistas of mountain cliffs and far-away peaks, swinging gently as cool air lifts off the snow bringing the scent of pine and balsam. At the top, you stare. You turn half-way, all the way around...all is beautiful, snow-covered mountains, some black with old basalt peaks or holding glaciers over their shoulders, like elegant ladies with white fur stoles. Clambering around little goat-paths, sitting on rocks looking out, and out...there are people, but most are silent. It's a place to balance your camera, to breathe. And wish you could stay forever. 

 

 Onwards and Upwards! To Narnia and the North!

 - C.S. Lewis, The Horse and His Boy

Except we aren't going North. We are heading south, to Three Hills AB.

        We move to the new place in Three Hills around the middle of August, so another month of this limbo. It's a bit confusing. We are very, very blessed to be able to stay at my parents home. As I type this, we are sitting companionably around the kitchen table. (I'm being terribly anti-social but I do look up from time to time and offer my valuable opinion on the issue at hand...hurray for me)

 

But it is a bit confusing. I think we all feel fragmented. I can't seem to remember what I'm supposed to be doing, and there are so many small things to take care of. I know I'm whining and it's annoying. I have a new perspective, a tiny slice of what it might be like to be a refugee, or someone permanently displaced. We all need our own little holes to crawl into. That reminds me of a verse... "And Jesus said to him, 'Foxes have holes, and birds of the air have nests, but the Son of Man has nowhere to lay His head.'" Matthew 8:20

Hmm. Interesting. I'm not saying in the least that I now relate to how Jesus felt on earth; it's just something I never really thought of before. He was homeless, by choice. He was intentional with everything in His life. He chose a lot of things I would not have chosen.

 

Midnight, and I had better at least go through the motions of going to bed, opening a window, laying my head on the pillow, closing my eyes. This blog post is seriously disjointed, but I guess that's ok, kind-of fits with the theme. I have no idea what I'm doing tomorrow. Which is alright, for now. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

In Oceans Deep

Moving Journal Entry #2

June 19, 2014

One thing about moving that I find hard is "the last times". There's the last drive to school, the last sleep in your room, the last walk down the driveway, the last smell of the lilacs, the last stroll with the dog, last look around at the place you've called Home.

Because I'm of the sensitive-soul type (who isn't, though, really), I think about these things and I have a sharp-knife-point awareness of them as we go along. I try not to think too much or move too fast, to keep the point on the outside of the skin, to keep the hurt out. I'm too aware of the stress my children are feeling. We all are under the weight of loss and the relentless time-keeping the days impose. My husband's voice is a bit sharp as we drive away and leave his old red truck in someone else's driveway.

Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders, let me walk upon the waters, wherever you would call me Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander and my faith will be made stronger in the presence of my Savior                            

 "Oceans"      -HILLSONG

Keep our eyes above the waves, Lord.

The only way through is to keep walking, keep one foot stepping in front of the other. Every other day we ask ourselves and each other -
 'What are we doing, again? This is a good thing, right? Are you sure we've got this right?'
This is where the exercising of the faith comes in. I must confess the muscle is weak and flabby and tires easily.


One moment I'm packing, fast and efficient, cleaning almost frantically - tripping, phoning, getting things done. The next, I'm slowed to a crawl. I stare at the cupboards, wonder what to do with the food (What did we do last time? Why can't I remember anything?) and then turn away from the cupboards and go outside. I'm worried the piano won't take one more move. We need that piano, it's a family heirloom now, and Lauren plays it constantly - but the legs have become weak. I'm afraid to move it even one inch. What if it breaks? I might break.

Because I'm sentimental but also ridiculous and sarcastic, there's a bit of Jekyll and Hyde going on. A tear rolls down for some reason. Two minutes later I'm rolling my own eyes at my own tears. Cue exaggerated eye-rolling. (It's not that big of a deal! Come on, people move every day. Get over it.) Much of the time I'm just fine and logical and perfectly calm, a paragon of rationality, one might say. Mmm.

I am more than Thankful for these days when I've had a few hours to myself, where I can think and sit in the quiet of an empty house and plan. I realize it's a huge privilege and I don't take it for granted, and I also know it's pretty much over. This afternoon is sports day at the school, then tomorrow is a short day, the last day. Today I'm going to be mowing the lawn, packing every box and thing I'm able to lift into a container, selling the mower, dealing with stuff. Looking for more boxes. I thought I had PLENTY of boxes, but I thought wrong.

The thing with Last Things, what gives them a knife-edge of sadness, is the word regret. Regret is one of the saddest words in the English language, me-thinks.

Because whenever you say good bye to something, there's always a what if. What if we had spent more time in the yard? What if the kids had finished the fort? Why didn't I have more family and friends over? Why didn't I finish that project? Why didn't we take more family photos? Ahh, regret. It permeates life. We never have enough time. We always make mistakes, that's just the way it is. We do our best with what we have in each moment, and sometimes we don't have anything left in that moment and our best is pitiful and sad.
But I believe it's ok. I believe this is NOT the END. How can we step out with confidence? How to set our hearts and eyes straight forward? How to let the sad and regret shake off like water drops, to only absorb what we can handle? How?
Because this isn't the end.
Eternity stretches out - and I believe we will have all of heaven to get the moments back. All is not lost! It's never lost, as long as we are breathing. I can do all these hard things, yes sometimes with tears, when I am holding the Hand of my God. Everything else I can let go, because when we leave this brief earth-sojourn it is only His Hand we will be holding.

...and there I find You in the mystery, in oceans deep my faith will stand

 

I Don't Have Time to Blog

I really shouldn't be doing this.

I have imminent packing responsibilities, crazy-too-much work, I'm on the phone with a mortgage specialist RIGHT NOW (well, holding...cue uplifting piano elevator music) and yeah. Stuff.

But I want to have a bit of a record of this move process. So it dawned on me that I could enter blog posts like a journal, just a few lines here and there, and not have to say everything all at once. Here goes...

Friday, June 13  9:15 am

Horrors. It's Friday the 13th! Nah. Never bothered me.
I'm sure everything will be FINE. (nail biting ensues)
House is officially sold, signed and sealed, so now the packing begins in earnest.
Not just packing, but sorting - the agonizing sorting know as "Organizing". They even have specialists who do this. I'm wondering if it will be an Olympic sport. Now, I should be good at organizing, because I was the Go-To organizer in our household growing up. The cupboards, the bookshelves, the closets, the junk drawer...all these I was recruited regularly to sort out. And so developed the myth that Pam is a good organizer. I say myth, because it's not true!! Under duress I can indeed organize, but it's not really natural. I don't care if things are haphazard, as long as I can stuff them in a drawer when company comes over. So I suppose I excel at the appearance of organization. Hmm.

Back to today.  Typically, I have 3 or 4 things I'm working on at once. And about 34 threads of thought streaking like night-traffic seen from space. (cue sound effects - "piyooo! piyooo!")
 - Should we keep the red bucket that I ran over 5 years ago? Or throw it out? What if we don't have the money for a new bucket? Better keep it.
- The garage was clean, now it's a new disaster. We are going to have to bring in the army to help us get out of this place, I just know it!
- The lawn needs to be mowed ALREADY?!?!? AGAIN??!!
- The cat's pregnant. Should we try and give her away this minute or keep her and enjoy the kittens?
 - Groceries. Need groceries. Somehow that annoying "food is essential for life" thing keeps cropping up. No pun intended.
 - My clothes are horrible. I hate them, every single item. Except for those new socks. Should I give away all my clothes? I don't feel like packing these ugly clothes!

So yeah. It goes on like that. All at once, and once again I've had way too much coffee already today. I'm tping way fastr tha I cann spell. !! Gaaa!!

Better run. ttfn.

Treasures, Trees, and Trust

This morning I finally picked up my Bible for the first time in a long time.
No, it wasn't because I was feeling extra spiritual, and no, it was definitely not because my husband is planning to go to Bible school in the fall and I better get my act together.
It was simply that I was waiting for something to load on the computer, and I thought, "Well, it's as good a time as any." I think I was trying to answer the subconscious conviction in my heart, because I know without the water of the Word the life dries up and all things wither. But it has been a slow process of dawning obedience and I can't say I will pick up my Bible tomorrow, though sincerely I hope I do.

So I read Isaiah 45, on this the closing day of the sale of our home of 8 years (still waiting for confirmation on said sale). Here are a few treasures...

"I am the Lord and there is no other; apart from me there is no God. I will strengthen you, though you have not acknowledged me, so that from the rising of the sun to the place of it's setting men may know there is none besides me. I am the Lord and there is no other."

AWESOME. How many 'others' have I tried to follow and find God in....

'I will strengthen you.....though you have not acknowledged me...'

Yes, and yes. The staggering thing is the faithfulness he has in the face of our disdain, our misunderstanding, our godlessness.

When the equations of life are not to our liking, we take the God part out. So be it, if all we have now is the Question, the Unsolvable Equation; at least we are free of the God Problem.

I don't agree with many other Christians. Christians are dumb.
                            Take the God-part out.
I find church annoying and limiting and judgemental.
                             Take the God-part out.
I think the world and society have some good points that I can't reconcile with faith.
                             Just, take out the God-part.
These questions I have are too big. I need answers and I can't find them.
                             Take out the GOD PART ALREADY.

One thing I know, as people, we have a very high opinion of our own ideas and intellect. And now with information streaming high-speed over the internet we are even smarter. So smart, that all the ridiculous answers that we've been given by God are just - laughable. Infected, pus-oozing with our own pride, we have become so sick we are immune to the cure.

It's very lonely outside of the friendship of God.

With it, peace.

"They will say of me, 'In the Lord alone are righteousness and strength.'"

Am I still wrestling with several unsolvable questions?
Do I still feel angry over the injustices upon the earth?
Do I still think, "truly you are a God who hides himself..."?  (vs 15)

Oh yes.
However, I am sobered by the Words.

"Woe to him who quarrels with his Maker, to him who is but a potsherd among the potsherds on the ground. Does the clay say to the potter, What are you making? Does your work say, He has no hands?"

                 *                              *                            *

"I have not spoken in secret, from somewhere in a land of darkness; I have not said to Jacob's descendants, 'Seek me in vain."

The hand of God on your heart is heavy, and sweet. It comes as He wills, and not as I will. How we want to be in control of our own lives!! Master of our ships, commanders of destiny. The desire to surrender does not come from inside us, it comes from Outside and brings freedom with it. You see? Unsolvable equations.
Surrender = Freedom.

Life is in mind-blowing transition for me right now. The sun bathes the white-blossomed apple trees in front and back of the house, and I don't want to leave. The closet wall has the heights and ages of the kids etched in from the last 8 years. The road outside is the same one I walked as a girl, kicking stones, dancing alone under the sky, and considering how the baked-brown earth looked like chocolate. Through each new window is a beautiful, large tree that shelters and strengthens at the same time. On the grass the dog lies soaked in sunlight on the same spot where we first played with her as a puppy...and I don't want to leave. It's hard right now, but don't feel sorry for me, don't be swept away by my tide of sentimentality; it's all working out my trust. The trust is a little shaky. Each step forward takes a lot of courage. This is the inside of my life right now, looking out.

I hope to update more often.

If conditions are removed today, our house sold in 5 days.
This week we go again to Three Hills to look for a place to live.
In the meantime, everyday life still happens, and the weight of everything that needs to be done is actually crushing, all the responsibilities needing to be shouldered.
And so I'm really thankful for this time I took to write my thoughts out. It should serve as a record and a reminder for the future, the future that right now stretches out like shimmering mirage-like waves that rise off the burning highway, unclear.

Grateful for the friendship of God today. He is huge, and he will be my shelter and strength; I pray it is so.

 

 

  

 

 

So. We're Moving...Yep.

WELLLLLLL!!! What have we here!!!?? AN ACTUAL blog post from Pamela?!?

Will Wonders Never Cease. Shock and of course Awe.

               ... Ok, now that I've got the self-deprecating sarcasm out of the way (expected), WHAT has been going ON??

First, I wanted to finish the little series on personalities. I really liked that thing and it is so badly unfinished. Sad face. :(
I wanted to explore the different personality combos (Phlegmatic/Choleric/Psychedelic), <---not a="" personality="" real="">  look at a few famous people and how their personality affected (or didn't affect) their life stories, talk about how opposite temperaments attract each other, and finally..... discuss how it's all really crap and we are all unique, special, unclassifiable, amazing individuals!!Personality Ptooie! Oh and also I was going to ask readers to guess what personality blend I am. Maybe another time. (or you can guess now, that would be fine too!)

I really do think the grains of truth in personality study are worth looking at. It can help open up people to understanding and appreciating others, especially significant others or those who drive you up the wall, or both...as the case may be. But there is a limit to it, so as a wise man once said, "Know your limit, stay within it!" :)
Actually I think that has something to do with gambling or drinking responsibly. 
Anyway, it applies here, too.

Second, life has been really busy and really confusing. There has been some big stuff come down the pipe, and I've been trying to unload and sort through it and get it off my chest or back or whatever. 'Nuff said.
What's the big stuff?? Well there have been a few issues of my own (dot dot dot) but REALLY, it's all about Dylan, this guy I live with, and his (our) decision to go to Bible college next year.

*       *      * 
I grant you three asterisks of time to download that information. It may not be enough time, but it will have to suffice.

So it was tough to write a blog on Other Stuff and pretend that the Big Stuff wasn't happening and taking up all of my brain-space.

Now this decision is not random or out of the blue, though it may appear so, because he (Dylan) has been thinking of this for ...oh...the entire length of time I've known him. And now, after years of thinking and wondering and shoving it all back on the back burner, this year it became a Decision That Had to be Made. Should we, or shouldn't we?
 
The pros and cons list doesn't actually help when you know you have to do something. It merely delays the inevitable. Are there just as many cons as pros, and pros as cons? Yes, there about is. In the end though, we know we have to do this. Even if it turns out to be just one year, at least we (he) will have the peace and satisfaction of knowing we tried. He tried. We. He? Gaaaaaah whatever. 

This is really about Dylan but by default it becomes about me, and the kids, and even the dog Cinder, and the cats Bolt and Creamsicle. (Also our kids have names.) (Not important right now.)

And so, this brings us to the moving part. Honestly it has been nuts, completely nuts, lately. As you can imagine, so many decisions and variables to consider, distractions, voices, ideas, opinions,

:/ ok now all I'm thinking about is how the word 'opinions' looks a lot like the word 'onions', and I'm wondering why this is, and if they are related in any way...Halp!

Right now we are organizing inside, outside, garage-side, shop-side, basement-side.

 Mostly I start boxing up stuff in a room or closet, and end up sitting on the floor looking at books, or old pictures, sighing nostalgically, and then getting up rather stiffly and shuffling to another room, where I start imagining the chaos that will be unleashed in reorganising THAT room...and then getting very stressed-feeling and going outside, where I am distracted by thinking "Who will take the dog, that dog has lived here all her life, this is going to involve dog psycho-therapy I'm sure" and then raking a pile of leaves and branches, realizing there are serious ACRES of leaves and piles, digging a bit with a shovel, then wandering back inside where I realize I need to deal with e-mails and phone calls and bills and oh jeez we have not a stick of groceries in the house, what on earth are we going to EAT?

At that point there is a tiny brain implosion and I become incapable of doing anything but playing a mindless game on my phone, for about 5 minutes, and then racing madly into town to pick up the kids from school. The theme here is madness. But I'm going to be okay, really, I mean here I am blogging, while surrounded by piles of things that need to go places, papers, bags, boxes filled and unfilled, and the house going up for sale momentarily. I seem to be blinking rather fast. Is that a bad sign? Is that normal?

'blink blink blink'

SIGH.

I can do this.

I am excited (no, excited is a strong word)....I am inspired by the possibility of change. It's going to be tough, but good for us.
Many people do not understand, and I get it.
Why give up a perfectly good job to study something that is not going to advance but rather decrease your family financial situation??
Why put your kids in a different school when they are going to a lovely school here with lovely friends and teachers, etc,??
Why give up your house and acreage to move into a place that definitely will not be an upgrade??

These are all very good questions. Sometimes it's hard to sleep at night for thinking of them.

For now, let's just say it is all to do with God, and His purposes, and believing in that, and wanting to help people in a more whole-life way. Not everyone is supposed to do this, and I'm not sure what it's going to look like for us, but we do know that we have to step off the cliff and onto some faith, and trust that if God is real (and He is), and if we can't shake this "calling" (we can't -we've tried), then moving ahead is our only real option. It's a bit messy and grey and it would be really nice if there was more black-and-white involved, but that's what it is. Maybe more about the journey in a next post.

And Now You Know.

((((hugs))))

ttys.

p.s. I think onions are opinions without the pi. Or maybe opinions are onions with pi? Pie? Or something with ions. Or not --

   

 

Friendly, Talkative Sanguine

Sanguine!!!

The Sanguines burst upon the scene like fireworks: vivacious, colourful, loud, and all eyes on them!
Sanguines would prefer to either be first, or, as in this case, make a grand entrance at the end of the show. Hurrah!!

Everybody loves a Sanguine. And a Sanguine loves everybody! Being with people, talking, laughing it up, telling ridiculous stories...this is Life At It's Best for this personality type. Unlike the introverted Phlegmatic and Melancholy, Sanguine is out there. Extroverted and the life of the party. Who is standing on the table? Who is telling a loud story (embellished richly with details that may or may not be exactly truthful but are certainly hilarious), attracting a growing audience? The dancing girl in my last post with the huge piece of cake, going from guest to guest, is a Sanguine. She's having fun and wants everyone to have fun, too.

If you've watched Parks and Rec (TV show), Tom Haverford is a Sanguine. Yep.  You get it.
(If you haven't watched P and R, what have you been doing with your life!? That show is a riot. In a can. With sprinkles.)

"Everywhere I go, I'm walking on red carpet." -Tom Haverford

"The only good font is the Soprano's one where the R is a pistol." - also Tom Haverford

Tom has the classic Sanguine conundrum; he wants to be amazing, successful, popular, and talented....but he also wants to do whatever he wants, and that part usually wins. He wants to have money, but he wants to spend money more. He wants to have good relationships with people, but he doesn't want to give more of himself than he has to. He wants his cake....and he can't believe he just ate it, the entire thing, by himself.

Signs and Wonders

You can tell a Sanguine pretty much by the way they dress. (But not always.) Where a Melancholy will be carefully matched, often in pastels or softer colours, a Sanguine will be wearing Skittle clothes. Ok maybe not exactly Skittles, per se. You will notice them, though.

 The coach with the plaid shirt, dark purple pants, red tie flung over his shoulder. The woman who comes to the party late, laughing, dressed in yellow, orange and peacock blue, and some kind of 'bling' flashing. The kid who can't wait to dye his hair orange and picks the most amazing looking running shoes at Sport Chek...you know the ones.

The color red is a popular choice of the true Sanguine. Rock stars often wear red, when they aren't wearing black...Jim Morrison, Steven Tyler, Taylor Swift,  Axl Rose, Sting, Demi Lovato, Gwen Stefani, Brandon Flowers...etcetera. All front, center, and sporting a red something; bandanna, stilettos, Napoleon jacket, lipstick vest. Being a rock star and being Sanguine kinda go hand in hand.
 
Someone like Kurt Cobain though? A front man who was not a Sanguine, he couldn't stand the attention and lack of privacy. It probably drained him utterly being in front of people all the time. Naturally introverted, he wanted people to "get" his music, but it drove him crazy watching them all sing along. "With the lights out/it's less dangerous/here we are now entertain us/I feel stupid and contagious/here we are now, entertain us" go the lyrics to the grunge song that blew up the charts, toppling glam rock and pop like a statue of Stalin. He was a Melancholy/Phlegmatic in a Sanguine/Choleric world; a creative person in a performer's role.
I'd love to dedicate a whole blog post to Kurt and grunge and personality....maybe some day.
Oh well, whatever, nevermind.

The Good, Bad, and Ugly in Sanguine Town

The great thing about Sanguine people is they are so optimistic and fun-loving. They know how to motivate and inspire, and can quickly spread enthusiasm for a project. Their curiosity and high-energy bravado make them excellent idea people, good at selling and getting things "off the ground." They have very expressive faces, and often talk with their hands. A Sanguine is likely to view giving a speech as a great opportunity, and will approach it with confidence and excitement. They will be so funny and interesting that no one will notice they only followed their notes for about two minutes.

 If you need someone to introduce you to people, the Sanguine will be the perfect contact. They have so many friends it's not even fair. If you are feeling down, the Sanguine will take you on a shopping spree or an impulsive trip, saying, "Come on! It will be so fun, you'll love it!" Sanguines live in the moment, and forget about the past easily. They will forgive and forget. When the Sanguine finally arrives (because he completely lost track of the time), every head turns and everybody smiles, genuinely happy the Sanguine is here to start the party.

Tigger is Sanguine

The Bad 

On the downside, Sanguines can be attention hogs, and may barge into conversations simply because they feel left out. Generally disorganized and lackadaisical about boring things like time and schedules, the Sanguine may have a messy desk and constantly be late for meetings and appointments. The maddening thing is though they will apologize profusely, you know they will do it again tomorrow. They truly cared, deeply, for about thirty seconds, and then it faded into the past. 

The Sanguine will have a great idea, but won't be able to see it through. They need someone to do the legwork, to keep them on track, or they will litter the landscape with abandoned projects. "Well it seemed great at the time, but it's totally not fun anymore."

Sanguines are expressive talkers. They might knock a vase off your table with their flailing arms. They love to talk, and may not have the patience to listen. If you try telling them your problem, they will most likely launch into a story to illustrate how they feel exactly the same way, and before you even finish your sentence they will have it all figured out. Sanguines must learn to Shut. Up.

Speaking of stories, they love telling them, often embellishing details and adding little things here and there to make it more interesting. Not lying really...not meaning to lie.... but yeah it's actually lying if you think about it. And if you tell a Sanguine something in confidence, well, don't say I didn't warn you. They seem to have an uncontrollable need to spill, whether it's their guts or someone else's.
(Ok that wasn't a great sentence from a visual perspective...haha. Idioms taken up a notch don't always read well!)

Being with an impulsive Sanguine can be AWESOME - and it can also be hell. "What!? You booked us tickets for where?? WHEN???!"  
"Excuse me? You are getting married...TOMORROW??" 
"Well we were thinking of tonight, but thought it might be too soon." Sometimes the best advice a Sanguine can hear is 'Think Before Acting or Speaking'.
Ahhh, yes. That.

Sanguines are often over-sharers. Every thought they want someone to hear or identify with gets posted on Facebook or Instagram immediately. It's a great time, but really...people may have other things to do than read your post, oh Sanguine. And if they don't "like" it immediately, it doesn't mean everyone hates you and you're a loser. Just post about half the things you want to, and the world will still go on.

The Ugly

There's nothing ugly. That was just to finish the phrase. If there is anything ugly, the Sanguine will pretty it up and sell it for 10 times its worth. 

 

The Wrap-up

The fun-loving, sunny Sanguine can be great to have around, but too much exposure can make you feel a bit sun-burned. You may need to seek shelter, especially if you are on the introverted end of the spectrum. Sanguines need to learn that life goes on when they aren't the center of attention. Also, they like to hug everyone they meet, or drape themselves on people to show affection, but a little shoulder squeeze here and there will do it. 

  If the Sanguine works with their strengths and considers how to tone down their weaknesses, he or she can become fairly balanced. If they get out of control, well, that tends towards narcissism. The ME Monster....and nobody likes those.
Admittedly, the above portrayal has been something of a caricature. No Sanguine is totally as I've described, because there are bits of the other personalities sprinkled in that change the flavor of  individual temperaments.
If You are Sanguine, don't hide your personality and think that you are "too much" for everyone.  Enjoy your flair and zest.  When you feel anxious and burnt out, try and relax; take a seat, lean in and listen to someone else.
If you are close to a Sanguine, take a deep breath and dive in. They will help you get the most out of life. If you feel overwhelmed, let them know gently. The Sanguine's feelings may seem hard and brittle like candy, but they are pretty sensitive, more like fudge.

I hope this post opens a window on understanding the personality that loves life, loves people, and just wants the whole world to love them back.